Am I dumb????

I DELETED a post today..cause I must be a total idiot!!!!! (either that or a monumental "growing up")


But there's one song that still manages to kill me. Apart from the waiting through the remaining family trials.

I love living on my own. I love the Independence it affords me. And I love the communication my Mom and I now have, since we're not fighting about "how to live" anymore. We're apart, but I really feel that we listen to each other now. That we communicate, and RESPECT(!!!!) what each other have to say. Which is so important to me, now that things aren't just discarded with the anger.

I know how I feel means I'm moving forward...because I'm feeling things again that I haven't in years. It's tough, but I wouldn't go back for anything.

I'll say it now...cutting, something I've done, and have not been able to "say" for quite some time, ROBS you of emotion. It's no better than medicating with drugs...you feel nothing. And while life might "hurt" (and it surely does sometimes) you are stronger for it in the end! There is no greater proof of that than some of the most inspirational people in my life..Ms. M and her BFF... L. Two wonderful women who ALWAYS manage to live with their hearts first! Most of all my own Mom
Who, throughout my life has tried to teach me a great many things, including pride in myself, and pride in my family! It's time I start embracing her lessons.

I guess it's just human nature not to know how important someone is until you are not with them every day. The lesson is, I know now. And continue to use that knowledge to live, and mature, and be the woman I should be, everyday. (And just because...wow...OK Cornball me!!)