Thursday, April 5, 2007

World War 3

So my friend Johno signs on last night to show me pictures he found of World War 3. Oh...buddy.

WW3 happened back in late November early December last year, and was a COMPLETE debacle of a party. Johno invited everyone to the homestead in Jersey, so Boyfriend, myself and another friend trekked out for some fun.

The night started off well enough, everyone drinking, playing video games, beer pong and the like. As we mellowed out, the instruments came out and we had an impromptu TOOL jam session. On and on it went, until finally it came time to roll out, and Boyfriend and I couldn't find my friend anywhere. Now I may be very drunk here, but boyfriend isn't and he can't find her either! As it turned out she'd met a guy, and they made busy friendly hiding in the basement. .......now normally something like that would a) shock the hell out of me b) hasten my vacating the party and c) seriously think about bringing said friend to another party. But this was not the normal run of things. Quite frankly Johno has no rules, and doesn't give a damn about much. He in fact told me so when I pulled him aside to discuss the aforementioned situation and offer my apologies for friend's behavior. Alcohol greases the wheels in talks of negotiation and peace.

So we were convinced to stay a bit longer, drink a bit more, and not leave. Hitch number 2 came when BMC's date inquires of us all smoking on the front porch "Why is my boyfriend sucking face with some chick in the kitchen?"

I'd like to take this time to suggest, for anyone who has never been in this situation before, that the BEST course of action (and the one I took) is to say NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I put down my cigarette, opened the front door, and sure enough BMC and a girl he did not bring to the party are getting mouthily acquainted. Lets skip ahead to the fun part.

About an hour later I'm again on the front porch smoking a cigarette with BMC, calmly avoiding any conversation that may have had to do with the since ended drama of confrontation. When he looks up at me and says, sarcastically, "I just want to thank you for telling on me to Megg" Drunk complacency on hold. "B. I have never been more honest in my life than right now, I didn't say SHIT to her. She asked US why you were." Awkward silence. "Well, ok then, sorry I thought it was you." We then discussed the matter a bit further and agreed, inebriation notwithstanding, that that maaaaybe wasn't the best time for him to act impulsively.

Even with these two hits the party could have come out only mildly scathed. But was BMC and I finished our smokes and headed back in, the scene with which we were greeted signaled the end of the night. One of Johno's coworkers girlfriends, pounding on the bathroom door swearing obscenities, and the dreaded words..."I know you're fuckin cheatin on me, now get the fuck out here" *Quick look around* And I realize... Oh no! Where is friend? My friend, her friendly new friend, and another guy I didn't know exit one at a time from the bathroom.

If it were the comic universe how I would prefer it, I would have used my telepathy to signal boyfriend to get the smoke grenades ready. That on my count he would toss them, I'd grab my friend and we'd make a stealthy Batman worthy exit! As it happened there was screaming, yelling, denial, and my friend being ready to slam this girl in the face.

I often wonder how I get myself into these things.....

After most of the shouting, and laughter (I forgot to mention a good number of people, including Johno, thought that if not for the threat of cops, this was hilarious) with rival parties separated, it was REALLY time, for everyone, to leave. Except for one problem. As we head to the front door with everyone else, Spags, quite determined and quite drunk pulls me aside and says to me;

S "Tell me what happened"
ME"Well I'd love to Spags, except I wasn't in the room, and honestly can't tell you."
S "NO I KNOW what happened....I want YOU to tell me what happened"

I'm confused for a second before I realize, Oh my god he thinks it was ME in the bathroom

ME "Spags I wasn't in there, she told me what happened, and she wouldn't lie to me, so as far as I know nothing happened"
S "Look...I'm not mad...I just want you to tell me what happened in there"

At this point Boyfriend came to my rescue "C'mon we gotta get goin" We mention the event every so often and we all have a good laugh about it now. Except for Spags, who I think still might be under the impression I was in the bathroom. Maybe someday I'll fill him in. : )

1 comment:

James said...

.......I'm slightly confused, I don't know who wrote that, and no...I didn't request the site : / haha